A better way

Last night I was cooking dinner and asking Jesus different things. In light of these last 5 months one of my main questions has been, "Why didn't you just make it to where people did whatever they want when they want it because it seems we do that anyways." His response was, "So you could experience love in its truest, highest form. My way is life." Because loving someone, loving Jesus is about the sacrifice of self. The sacrifice of wants, of brokenness, of anger and demand. We have an entire culture that is built on doing what we want, when we want and many times at the expense of someone else. I have been the queen of that recently. Out of my own anger, my own 'give me what I want, when I want it' heart. And all of the decisions I have made out of that place have been at the expense of someone else. Whether it was a guy I really didn't like, I simply used toward my own benefit. The people I live with who prayed, cared and loved. And most of all, at the expense of Jesus who gave everything so that I might choose a different and better way. It's scary how dark my heart can be. It's scary how low I can go. It's scary how selfishly motivated I am and I have justified it all because of my own 'hurt and pain'. And here is Jesus whose entire Kingdom is set-up completely opposite from ours. It's about making choices and decisions at the benefit of the other. As He did. And the motivation of His heart was love and a desire for something better and greater....for someone else. For me. For you.